Say "I do"

The gospel

The gospel

John 3:16 NIV

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

Why is this one of the most quoted verses of all times?

What is it that compels us to talk about this love and embrace this promise yet we often times live as if this love wasn’t real?

There is a need for love that we have engraved deep in our hearts.

We were created for relationship; we all want to be loved. There is a void in our hearts that desperately wants to be filled.

We want people to like us, love us, understand us, forgive us, encourage us, help us, be there for us…

We want a Relationship.

Faith to follow our God given destiny

The reason God can love us the way he does, is because he is love.

Love is not something he gives, even though he does. It is not something he can express, even though he does. It is not something he has to offer, even though he has plenty.

But it goes beyond that, he not only can love, HE IS LOVE.

When it comes to marriage, a lot of things are said today.

Many people, even Christians, don’t believe in marriage.

I am not sure how we drifted from God’s idea about life.

But I know that each time we pull away from his original design bad things happen.

I am a believer that most of the bad reputation that marriage has is a result of a poor understanding of the gospel, God’s love, and his original design.

Original design illustration...

God is a Trinity. The word “Trinity” (lit. “a unity of three”) is a theological term that is used to express what the Bible teaches about the nature of God. In the simplest of terms, it means that God exists as three Persons. The three Persons are: God the Father, God the Son (Jesus Christ), and God the Holy Spirit (also called the Holy Ghost).

(Early Christians used a diagram to visually explain the Trinity (last page of lesson). The Father, Son and Holy Spirit are all God; they are not three names for the same person. The Persons are distinct: the Father is not the Son, the Son is not the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit is not the Father.

The story of the gospel helps us understand marriage. In the same way understanding marriage will help us understand the gospel.

The gospel is the story of a groom coming for his bride.

It’s a story of a groom coming for his bride.

Isaiah 61:10 NIV

10 I delight greatly in the Lord; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

God sees the Church as His bride. He is perfecting her, covering her, making her into something beautiful.

We all needed or need to be saved. Saved from what? From condemnation because of sin in our lives. We can’t pay that debt. Only an eternal God could save us.

Jesus came to offer us forgiveness of sins by paying the debt we were supposed to pay. The wages of sin is death.

He died for us so that we could spend eternity with Him because that was the original plan. A perfect relationship with our creator.

Once we receive his gift of salvation, we begin a process of transformation. Some call this Sanctification.

As we begin this process we are being prepared for eternity and along the way our responsibility is to bring as many as we can with us.

And what does marriage have to do with this process?

A lot!

Because the miracle of salvation should be reflected in marriage.

See, that’s where I find the biggest mistake. We often see marriage as the goal of our lives because we think it is about “what’s in it for me”.

But marriage is about finding the one we want to spend the rest of our lives with, and then help each other to prepare for eternity.

There is no marriage in heaven.

You often hear people talk about soulmates. Right? My perfect match. Bad news.... there is no perfect match.

In fact, Norma and I have talked about this. If we would have know how different we are before we got married, well, let’s just say it’s not the perfect match. We choose to be the perfect match when we sacrificially love each other and help each other be better.

Marriage is God’s idea. But too often we don’t see marriage in the light of eternity.

Marriage mirrors God’s relationship with his bride, the church.

Whosoever believes will be saved.....

Salvation gives us access to eternity. But as we wait, marriage will prepare us for eternity if we allow the gospel to reflected in it.

The miracle of salvation is.....

Reflected in marriage

A marriage between a man and a woman reflects the gospel.

Jesus humbled himself for us. And in marriage the more I die to myself, the more my marriage will reflect the sacrificial death of Jesus. But the more marriage becomes a reflection of myself, the more problems I’m going to face.

Jesus forgave our sins, and scripture says that he remembers our sins no more.

Some of us, because of our past, have brought some things into our marriage that are holding us back.

Some carry baggage from previous relationships, or even fears from growing up in a broken home.

But we can’t move forward unless we leave the past behind. It may be that repentance is needed, or a true moment of confession must happen. But if God’s love is in it, it will result in a stronger marriage that will reflect exactly what Jesus did for us.

Scripture says that the same power that raised Jesus from the death lives in us. It is available to all of us who are working in our marriages.

You can protect your mind.

You can get rid of addictions.

If you are single, you can remain pure until you pledge yourself in a covenant of marriage before God and your spouse.

The mystery of the gospel is reflected in marriage.

We can see this mystery revealed when we sacrifice our wants and needs and desires for those of our spouse.

Christ’s sacrifice should be on display through our marriage. And the power of the living God should be evident in our marriages. Grace, mercy, and forgiveness should be reflected as people see our marriages.

Salvation is reflected in marriage. And salvation is also....

Perfected in marriage

I am not saying your salvation is incomplete through Christ. What I am referring to is to that process of sanctification where you mature in Christ.

Marriage is the greatest place for you to develop your maturity in Christ.

Listen to this, there is no prayer meeting, Bible study, worship music, or anything similar that can possibly equal what will happen to you when you allow God to perfect your salvation through marriage.

It is the best place to see your character built.

Some people wonder what type of love is marriage built on. Is it on passionate love.

Phileo love?

Or is it agape love; unconditional self sacrificing love.

All three loves are mentioned in scripture.

Passionate (eros) love. You know, the honeymoon type of love…I can’t remember much about my wedding, but I do remember I wanted to get out and go.

Scripture also mentions the phileo love. And you need this!

It is the friendship factor. When you just want the other person’s company. I love having Norma by my side, and she loves my company too (most of the times).

Marriage is not always following the honeymoon schedule if you know what I mean. This kind of love, phileos love, helps us be best friends!

But then there is agape love.

This love transcends them all. This is the irrational, unconditional love that God demonstrated for us.

It is the covenant love. The kind of love that sacrifices for the good of another.

It is selfless, it is relentless. It is supernatural. Without this kind of love we are doomed to fail.

In fact, this kind of love separates the thriving marriages from the average boring ones.

This love should separate the Christian marriages from the made for TV movie marriages.

And I think we all have seen marriages that are built on erotic love. Where passion and really sex is all that they were looking for. But reality is you can’t build a lifelong commitment based on this kind of love alone.

Now phileos is necessary. I mean, you have to be able to connect, talk, and enjoy each other’s company.

if you are going to share your life with someone else, you must have some activities you enjoy doing together.

But agape love is the foundation God intends.

It is unconditional, always thinking about the other person.

This is GOSPEL love.

It is only possible when both sides are commited to the leading of the Holy Spirit.

That’s why I say to all singles out there, choose wisely!

No matter the difficulty you may face in marriage, anything can be overcome with Agape love.

Anytime you see a divorce. You are seeing the result of at least one spouse who refuses to allow the gospel to be perfected in their life.

Whenever the gospel is not perfecting you and me, we are powerless to build meaningful marriages and lifelong legacies.

Salvation is reflected in marriage. Salvation is perfected in marriage, and salvation is also...

Protected in marriage

A covenant is a blood bond before God.

Protected in marriage

The new covenant for believers was sealed when the Son of God was raised from the dead. This covenant was initiated through the sacrifice that Jesus made with his blood.

Marriage is then, a covenant within that covenant.

The ultimate covenant is between God and us. The marriage covenant reflects the ultimate marriage.

Within the marriage covenant we have protection.

We see today that the concept of marriage is distorted. Some people say things like “well, I want to be free. I want ultimate freedom. I don’t want anything or anyone to hold me back”.

This is a miss-understanding of what marriage really is.

Seeking freedom this way will ultimately lead to chaos.

When we think about freedom we think about a place with no rules, no consequences, no right and no wrong. Somewhere , John Lennon is smiling.

But this is an illusion, it is not reality. Because there is right and wrong, there is a God who has set a standard and boundaries for us to enjoy life. There are consequences for every choice we make.

Think about God’s principles as a fence. A fence that protects you from danger. Inside that fenced place there is freedom.

Now, I am not saying we are dogs… lol

God has set a fence of protection around us. We are free to live in this world but we are truly free when we live within the limits of protection God has established for us.

When it comes to marriage, God has set up a perfect fence. He has custom built a perfect fence for our marriages and he says: “be free in marriage!”

Enjoy the beauty of your relationship as you enjoy the gift of your spouse.

You are free, within marriage, to enjoy eros love, phileo love, and agape love.

You are truly free because of this covenant, this relationship I have established for you.

My Son laid down his life for your freedom. His death, burial, and resurrection are available for your life and it’s on tap for your marriage.

Have you responded to Him? Have you said I DO to Jesus?

If you are married, do people see the supernatural power of God in your interactions with your spouse?

Does your marriage reflect the gospel?

Is the gospel perfecting your marriage?

Is your marriage protected by the gospel?

God has sought you. He’s romanced you and paid the ultimate price for you.

He sent His son Jesus Christ to die for you. And He rose again!

Do you want to know what life is all about? What marriage is all about?

Say I DO to Jesus!

The implications of living for eternity by loving Jesus are huge!

The Gospel is the ultimate love story between God and His people.

Through the gospel He initiates and provides for our growth.

Marriage is all abut the gospel.

It is the place where the mirror of God’s agape love allows us the opportunity to showcase the power of God to a watching world.

And it’s a place where we can mature in our relationship with Christ.

So look up to heaven and say I DO.